There was much rejoicing in Rotax Max superkarting this week with the class administrators, the Superkarting Techincal And Sporting Investigators (STASI) announcing their plans to ensure a healthy future for the 125 Max class for at least another minus four decades, taking it well beyond the 1960's.

Morris Freelove, chief STASI negotiator, explained: "Innovation was ruining the sport. Too many new, sophistimmycated people were coming into the sport with their imperialist capitalism and it had to be stopped".

When pressed about the details of changes, Freelove explained that they had found an old rule made prior to the Federational Constitution which outlawed anything garish, loud and colourful. "We think it was originally passed to avoid offending the Amish" said Freelove "But we were able to use this rule and ban some of the more innovative karts purpose built for long track racing"

Some Amish, yesterday

Freelove giggled: "We also found a law which says it's legal to marry your sister, providing she's a practising seamstress or a boilermaker. Hilarious! " he said, before musing; "I wonder if that's ever been revoked..?" which we found a little disturbing.

Morris Freelove in the 60's, yesterday

Freelove heralded: "Now we can return to the glory days where hundreds of happy sprint karters can convert their cheap, plastic-bodied sprintkarts to superkarts in the blink of an eye! Allow me to demonstrate". Freelove embarked on a practical demonstration for the assembled (two) journalists, one of whom was actually there to interview Britek's Chris Jewell. We managed to endure the five hours it took to add rain lights, tie-wire bolts, instal side and rear numberplates and steering column tubes, and even waited three to five weeks as he applied for a different racing licence and logbook.

However, when Freelove insisted we join him for his medical examination, we suggested we'd come back later. Seven to ten days after that, Freelove announced: "And viola! You're ready to rock and roll. It's that simple" by which time all of us had grown beards and lost the will to live.

When asked about the safety aspect of sprint karts doing 120-160km/h, Freelove got grumpy: "Well, yes, some annoying non-conformists did question the idea of having a rearwards impact whilst sitting in a tiny seat with back support no higher than your coccyx. We have treated those complaints with the contempt they deserved. Quite frankly, everyone should know that if your seat has been fitted by a qualified, practising boilermaker, you will have absolutely no problems. In fact we recommend our category-approved boilermaker" he said, handing us the phone number of his sister, who he described as "rather hot".

But this was not enough for the non-conformists, according to Freelove. "Some people still didn't accept that we are totally committed to safety. That's why we have decided to find alternative venues on which to run superkarting, with lower average speeds. It's a little known fact- such venues have existed for some time. They're called go-kart tracks". When we pointed out to Freelove that racing sprint karts on sprint kart tracks would no longer be superkarting, he stormed off saying loudly "This interview is over" and we were chased off the property by some large, hungry looking alsatians.

Some STASI representatives, looking for more submissions on how to keep Rotax Max in the 1960's, yesterday